Our newly self-appointed minister of public health could hardly contain himself. "They have surrendered on our terms," said the (former) Minnesota Attorney General Hubert Humphrey III of the $6 billion verdict against the tobacco cartel. "Now we can move forward with our primary objective. That is, to change the way the people of Minnesota live . . . . "

Even as a nonuser of tobacco products, I pondered my government's newly enthusiastic interest in lifestyle. A voracious consumer of chocolate and potato chips, I wondered when I might become vulnerable to some sort of intervention on behalf of the greater public good. It was small comfort that the minister of public health seemed a bit pudgy last time I saw him on TV.

I shuddered as I pulled past another giant sport-utility vehicle to get into a gas station. I wanted a Coke for my suddenly parched throat.

On the way out I asked the scruffy checkout clerk, "Do you smoke?". He eyed me suspiciously. He too might have heard the news. His answer was too muffled to hear, so I asked again.

He softly mumbled in the affirmative through his peach-fuzz goatee.

"Let me buy you a pack," I said.

"Er -- Thanks, and have a good day" was his response.

Have a good day. Or else.

-- David McEachern, St. Paul.

The tobacco settlement is worth far less than $7 billion generally reported, and the value of the fee paid to Robins Kaplan Miller & Ciresi is far greater than the reported 7.1 percent of the settlement total.

This is because most of the dollars paid by the tobacco companies will be paid in the future and because a dollar to be paid in the future is worth less than a dollar paid today.

The correct way to describe future payments is in terms of "present value," which is the amount of money you must invest today so that, thanks to the magic of compound interest, it will grow to the exact amount needed to make the future payment.

Assuming that today's money will grow at a modest 5.8 percent, the deal is really worth about $4 billion in today's dollars, $3 billion less than the reported figure.

Since the Robins Kaplan firm gets its money faster than the other participants, its payments are worth relatively more. After the payments are properly adjusted, the firm is receiving a little under 11 percent of the value to be paid to the state and Blue Cross rather than the reported 7.1 percent.

-- Roger R. Conant, Sunfish Lake.

Now that it appears that the tobacco trials are being "settled," shouldn't the complicity of the state and insurance companies be put on trial?

How much money did the state gladly reap from tobacco taxes? Did not insurance companies charge higher premiums to smokers, while refusing to pay for smoking cessation plans?

Class action lawsuit anyone?

-- Thomas Payne, Minneapolis.

Congratulations, Minnesota! We should be proud of ourselves! We just fleeced a legal corporation, selling a legal product.

Skip just trashed the Constitution in the interest of his own political mileage. Nice guy! I know that's the kind of guy we need for our next governor!

If cigarettes are so evil, why don't we just outlaw them? The fact of the matter is that the majority of people don't want that to happen.

My father passed away from smoking-related illnesses last year. We miss him; he cannot be replaced. Even though I have to live with this fact every day, I can still see the light on this issue.

It's all about money. The lawyers will take in $467 million out of this deal. Let's see, if there were 467 lawyers working this case, that would make them instant millionaires.

The state legislators are already salivating over this ''windfall.'' Not bad for a government that already collects a huge surplus every year.

Maybe the local newspapers are next! There is too much violence reported in them. Go get 'em, Skip; you're on a roll!

-- Mark C. Bialon, Crosslake, Minn.

Now that we left tobacco in the smoke, we ought to go after the liquor industry. Think how many Americans and people of Minnesota are dying in alcohol-related accidents, even in the metro area alone. MADD has demonstrated the positive effect of a campaign against drunken driving.

-- John K. Bispala, Minneapolis.