May 13,2003 - Death By Chanel No. 5- Exasperated by her shiftless husband's stinginess, a Florida woman exacted a revenge most terrible. Dousing herself and her young daughter in perfume, the 36-year-old wife paraded before her chemically sensitive husband callously spraying shots of Lysol and burning scented candles. Clouds of bug spray completed the scene of horror.
Strangely the husband survived the assault and filed a complaint against his younger wife. He has produced a letter from his doctor "confirming" that he suffers extreme chemical sensitivity, "including all fragrances, air fresheners and other volatile chemicals," and that his wife was aware of his condition. The wife's lawyer counters that the husband is "a faker."
August 27,2003 - B.O.Legislation- "City officials say one smellyemployee is responsible for a new policy that requires all city employeesto smell nice when reporting for work. The Murfreesboro City Counciladopted the good hygiene policy Thursday:
'No employee shall have an odorgenerally offensive to others when reporting to work. An offensive bodyodor may result from a lack of good hygiene, from an excessive applicationof a fragrant aftershave or cologne or from other cause.' "
More outrageous than sitting down andcrafting a law to legislate cleanliness is the willingness of electedleaders to resort to lawmaking to address all aspects of life. Inthe old days an employee whose odor was offensive would have been orderedhome to clean up or to a doctor to investigate any physicalproblems. Instead of relying on interpersonal skills and commoncourtesy our rules concoct a law that will inevitably be misused. Expect an anti-smoking hysteric to invoke this law to harass a co-workerwho smokes.
June 23, 2003 - The Hypochondriacs Are In Charge Of City Hall - Question: What if Iam already contaminated with terrible smells but I have to go somewhere thatis Fragrance Free" - Answer: If you can,shower beforehand using baking soda instead of soap and shampoo. Baking sodaeffectively removes many odors. Change into clothing that has not been drycleaned or laundered with scented products, especially fabric softeners, andhas not been around smoke or fragrances. Rinse contaminated clothes withbaking soda. Dry without additives. Wear a hat to contain residual odorsfrom hair products. Wear an uncontaminated shirt over your other clothing.Depending on the event, these measures may be sufficient. Ask others presentif your clothing, hair, etc. is a problem. Leave if you cause discomfort toothers, or sense that your presence may be a problem. Remember: “An ounce ofprevention!” Planning ahead to be free of scents is the easiest and bestsolution.
The above comes verbatimfrom a Frequently Asked Questions sheet prepared by the city of Shutesbury,Massachusetts. The interlocutor is oneZiporah Hildebrandt (we could not make this name up), chairwoman of the ADACommittee. We single out this one exchange as the most unbelievable ina list of howlers but each and every exchange is truly jaw-dropping anddisplays how far the batty scent-free issue has intruded upon society. If one is to follow Nurse Hildebrandt's dictates don't imagine that merelyforgoing a splash of cologne or perfume will assuage the hyper-delicate. To be tolerable in the Shutesbury's odor mania even the hint of an"unnatural" order upon the body or clothes is forbidden. That includessmells picked up by handling faxes and paper run through copy machines aswell as all smoke. Just filled up your car" You will be rejectedby the standards of Shutesbury. Welcome to the brave new world of"fragrance-free" utopia. The odds are that you will not meet thestringent standards determined by Ziporah Hildebrandt and the whiners thathave hijacked Shutesbury.
April 30, 2003 - Can The Ghetto Be Far Behind" - Shutesbury, Mass. (AP) -- 'People who attend Shutesbury's upcoming town meeting will be segregated by scent to avoid disturbing those hypersensitive to chemicals and odors. Splitting the meeting hall into three sections May 3 is part of a two-year-long effort that also has produced ``fragrance-free'' hours at the library.
One section of the room will be reserved for people who never use perfumes or scented deodorants, detergents or other products. The second will be for those who sometimes wear fragrance but not on the day of the meeting, and the third will be labeled, ``Seating for those who forgot and used cologne and perfume.''
Using fragrances in public is similar to smoking, said Town Administrator David Ames, who is also responsible for making the town compliant with the Americans with Disabilities Act. He said the Massachusetts Office of Disabilities recommended establishing the fragrance zones.
A local survey found that nine of 52 respondents identified themselves as afflicted with multiple chemical sensitivities syndrome, although the National Institute of Environmental Health Science says the very existence of such an affliction is in dispute.' (Associated Press, 4/28/03)
There really isn't much more to add except that the reporter neglected to ask Head Nurse Ames just how it would be determined to what section each person should be herded. Will there be a super-nose sniffer checking underarm odor" Will Shutesbury invest in some high-tech scanning device" Town meeting attendees operate on the honor system" Or will Head Nurse Ames, this being Massachusetts after all, assign scarlet letters to those sinners who lasciviously smother sweaty body odor with deodorant so that the pure of scent can recognize their inferiors from afar"
January 15, 2003 - Smellybus passengers banned- That brain andintelligence are now reduced to a pair of nostrils isa devastatingly sad reality of our contemporary “health-conscious”society. In the city of Bend, Oregon, ‘Theregulations ban anyone who "emanates a grossly repulsive odour that isunavoidable by other Bend Extended Area Transit customers" from being in the bus station oron a bus. "It's an effort to keep the riding experience as pleasant andsafe as possible," said city attorney Jim Forbes. ‘It just so happen that the hysteria about odours is also a convenientexcuse to keep the smelly poor off city transit buses. Yesterday’ssegregation was about colour, religion, or even accent. Today it’s aboutsmell and lifestyle; the excuses have changed, but the substance has not -- it has justbecome much more petty. But hey, what is to be expected from a societythat seems to believe that cigarette odour kills"
October 17, 2002 - How To Buy Perfume - A Sign Of Our Hysterical Times - Fragrance sensitivity is also emerging as a growing workplace allergen. “People often joke about it, people wearing offensive perfumes,” says Carrie Loewenherz,” an industrial hygienist for the New York Committee for Occupational Safety and Health. But, she adds, for people sensitive to it, it’s no joking matter.
Take Lauren Colburn, an Atlanta, Ga. newspaper researcher, for example. She had to shift to the “graveyard” shift — a real hardship — to avoid people wearing perfumes and fragranced products. “But more sensitive people are speaking up about it, and I hope the perfume industry is listening,” she says.
The perfume industry can listen intently and respond to every complaint with alacrity but, as with the tobacco industry, nothing it does will ever be enough. As the newspaper researcher above makes clear, only the elimination of scented products will solve this problem, a problem that didn't exist 20 years ago and occurs only in the most affluent regions of wealthy nations. Like the scent of a freshly lit cigarette, an odor that until recently everyone, smokers included, found pleasing, perfume, cologne, deodorant and the like are all on the chopping block because of the hyper-sensitivities of a handful of complainers.
The well-researched article delves into some of the processes at work in producing scented products, identifies a few special interests who before too long will be advocating "scent-free" policies and even digs up some common sense comments from the Environmental Protection Agency.
May 23, 2002 - The smell delirium grows - Allergysufferers seek remedy on airplanes – "A new ruling that could ban perfume on airplanes is being welcomed by allergy sufferers across Canada. The Canadian Transportation Agency has been investigating complaints from passengers who reported allergic reactions to perfumes and pets aboard airplanes. … Dr. Matt van Olm, a Calgary respiratory disease specialist, believes scented products are like second-hand smoke."
Smokers said goodbye to their right to smoke on aeroplanes long ago. But the phobia about odours is far from over; in fact, the fraud about passive smoke just marked the beginning of a sick era of hypochondria and obsession about odours – and almost everything else. More generally, the sickness applies to the concept that those who claim to have dysfunction have the absolute right to force the entire society to conform and adapt to their needs. Long ago Michael Fumento warned us on the nose phobia about perfumes; but he was not taken too seriously by those whose vision is short enough not to see beyond their nose -- and now here it is. Soon, those who wear perfumes and after shaves on airplanes will find the police waiting for them at the airport. In times of normality (if there is such a thing anymore), stating that "scented products are like second-hand smoke" would simply mean that they are harmless – as much as "smoking in the elevator" was a police jargon to indicate a ridiculously small misdemeanour, worthy of just a benign sniff. No more. Today, junk science frauds find a fertile terrain in the hypochondriac stupidity of the masses, and allow the real problems to go unnoticed – such as the reduction of up to 90% of the air circulation on airplanes since the passive smoke fraud was embraced by the airlines. All we need is that the air has no scent (of tobacco, perfumes, or cats) and idiots are happy – even if there is contamination with tuberculosis, which has no scent at all. One antismoking slogan goes like this: "If you can smell it, it can kill you." Does anyone have still any doubt that we are going back to the Middle Ages"
Fragrancedangers - "The ban on fragranced products in Halifax, Nova Scotia, is not the trivial or amusing issue that some media make it out to be. On the contrary, fragrances are known to doctors, scientists and the fragrance industry as respiratory irritants. People suffering from asthma, allergies, chronic sinus problems, rhinitis, chronic lung disease and multiple chemical sensitivities (MCS) have their health problems triggered and exacerbated by exposures to fragranced products." - Why not" If one believes the second-hand smoke fraud, one can believe anything!
The smell test - To the horror of perfume makers worldwide, Halifax has become the first major center in North America to prohibit the wearing of all cosmetic fragrances - from Giorgio to grandmother's lavender soap - in most indoor public places, including municipal offices, libraries, hospitals, classrooms, courts, and mass transit buses.
Scents-orship - A story in last Saturday's National Post described the growing number of scent-free policies that have inundated our government buildings, schools, and workplaces as "the Halifax holy war." Halifax is also a "hysteria hotbed," and the foothold of "fragrance fanatacism."
Scentsand sensibility- The anti-perfume activists of Halifax target young and old alike. On Sunday, The Daily News reported that an 84-year-old Halifax woman was thrown out of city hall because she wore perfume to a council meeting. And yesterday, the News reported that the RCMP is investigating high school student Gary Falkenham after a teacher turned him in for wearing Aqua Velva deodorant and scented hair gel. Mr. Falkenham is understandably incredulous: "I just looked at [the officer] and said, 'Are you serious"'"
Scentsand senselessness - Nine cafeteria workers from the Dirksen Senate Office Building cafeteria in Washington, D.C. were rushed to the hospital last August. "Everyone was getting sick headaches, stomachaches, vomiting, diarrhea," said a cafeteria cashier. One worker suffered head and neck injuries when she collapsed, and the eight others reported nausea. "I threw up. I had a headache. I felt very lightheaded, nauseated," said one. The cause of this "poisoning"" "The haz-mat [hazardous material] unit went down, and all the readings were negative," a police officer said. "What they found was a bag of onions...and they just gave off a strong odor."