We’ve recently reported on some exceptions to "health, safety, and environment" obeisance amongst mainstream media sources. At America’s National Public Radio, however, you’ll still find nothing but genuflection, to a point of contortion.
The debate is over, the Earth is frying, it is your personal fault. The esteemed experts are in "consensus" on all of this this, and agree as we are told that "the oceans are what really matter when it comes to global warming," so one of their illustrious number has periodically taken the ocean’s temperature with thermometer buoys, to demonstrate to us all the soundness of the Olympians’ unimpeachable authority. NPR, in a story entitled "The Mystery of Global Warming’s Missing Heat," tells us they have done just that.

Now, even if they did not find that ocean temperatures are going up, even if in fact they found that the temperatures are going down ("very slightly" as NPR underscores), well, remember that data which defeats the theory proves the theory. You needn’t dwell on that statement. Just remember: the theory. That is all. After all, what is the progressive and enlightened way to interpret temperature readings that, instead of going up in accordance with confident prediction, are really going down? "One possibility is that the sea has, in fact, warmed and expanded — and scientists are somehow misinterpreting the data from the diving buoys."

You needn’t be confused. Just remember: the theory. That is all. After all, if things like plain numbers on a thermometer were taken seriously, confidence in the theory would be jeopardized, a heresy, an impossibility. Science deals only with the possible. So there you are. It stands to reason that lower thermometer readings, to the eye, are higher thermometer readings, to the ideology, which is to say science. If you don’t understand that you’re simply not progressive, enlightened, or welcome at NPR cocktail parties. So get with it.



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